Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Fat Kid Reviews: Caffe Niche

Caffe Niche on Urbanspoon


One of the greatest things of our modern era, in my reckoning, is the "Explore around me" feature on many map apps (Google Maps is my poison of choice.). As I somtimes do I found myself in a part of town I rarely frequent with two hours to kill and a need for breakfast food. So I whipped out my smart phone and magicked myself some recommendations.

I settled on Caffe Niche.

My first impressions of the place were less then ideal. Not that anything was off per say, but the place was trendy to the point of almost off putting (The decor and music being the prime offenders). However despite that, I did find myself enjoying what could only be described as the "vibe" of the place. I could see myself returning should the food be good enough.

The menu was small, elegant, and could have come off as hipster gibberish. Everything was marked with additional adjectives in front. "Local" being the frontrunner. I settled on the Corned Kobe Beef Hash, a side of Local Sausage, and some Local Coffee. I felt like I'd walked into an episode of the League of Gentlemen, which is a very weird show I enjoy.

At this point I have to give the waitress a fair bit of credit because I had two pens explode and she quickly helped me out with narrey a giggle at the suddenly Blueman. The service was fantastic, the perfect balance of attentive without breaching into pushy.

Now, before I move to the food, allow me a poetic indulgence.

Food, at its best, is more than just nutrients to jam into our face ports. It is an art that transports us across time and place. It can remind us of lost love and pull us back to time we had forgotten. It is the most primal of artistries because it ties inot an experience that all human kind relates.

I point this out because that is what their food did for me. The boldly saged sausage perfectly seasoned and cooked. The fresh bread with real butter and the perfect eggs over crispy and chewy potatoes with the beautifully assertive corned beef breaking in to make the whole dish sing.

As I sat there the reality of where I was faded and for a moment I as an eight year old boy sitting at Nana's table digging into breakfast before we ran down to work the garden down the hill.

Basically I lived the critic's part from the Disney film with the Rat Chef.

Now I'm not saying every person will time machine away once they taste their breakfast. But I can say that I did, and I enjoyed the hell out of breakfast.

So... probably worth a shot.


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See you in the Chow line,
-The Fat Kid